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GUARDIAN Mon, 21 Dec 2009 00:05:15 GMT
So, apart from Jedward, what will the past 12 months be remembered for? Age: 11 months and 21 days. Appearance: A creature with the body of Susan Boyle and the head of Barack Obama using an iPhone to tweet Stephen Fry about a nearby outbreak of swine flu. You forgot to mention Jedward. I wasn't actually trying to incorporate every single aspect of the year's news and popular culture in a single chimerical mental image. That would involve mentioning everything that has happened in the last 12 months; a task that would take for ever and yet, somehow, achieve less than nothing. But you have to mention Jedward! This has been The Year of Jedward. No, no, it hasn't. So what was it the year of? Well, it was the International Year of Natural Fibres, according to the United Nations. Is that why Ban Ki-moon kept dancing about in that hemp robe? No, that was a dream you had. What the secretary general did do was meet with President Barack Obama. Together they christened 2009 the Year of Climate Change. Because this was the year the world finally woke up and collectively made a historic commitment to deeply inadequate global emissions cuts? Something like that, yes. But that's not all we achieved. It was also the Year of Twitter, the Year of 3-D, the Year of Mobile Internet, the Year of Twilight and the Year of The Ox. And, according to an article in the New York Post, the Year of Aretha Franklin's Hats. Aretha Franklin's hats? It had pictures and everything. She wore some really big hats. I'm struggling to imagine any collection of hats, no matter how big, capable of defining an entire year. One of them was actually a hood. You've won me over. Forget that climate nonsense. It was the Year of Aretha Franklin's Hats. Do say: "Future generations will look back at this year and say, 'Thank you for this.'" Don't say: "They'll be talking about a massive hat." guardian.co.uk © Guardian News & Media Limited 2009 | Use of this content is subject to our Terms & Conditions | More Feeds
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